Thursday, April 7, 2011

How does that child downstairs have the energy to scream like that?

Seriously!  I barely even did anything today and I feel like I can barely keep my eyes open. And I guarantee that kid probably ran around like a maniac all day and still has the energy to scream bloody murder at nine o'clock at night like he's the first toddler to ever experience Christmas... or a terrifying clown at the circus. 


I'm not sure really what the cause of this exhaustion is. It feels emotional, really. Who thought emotions could be so draining on your energy? I feel like I really spend my whole day- especially days off- thinking about all the things I would like to be doing, or feel I should be doing, but then never really doing anything! Because I'm really tired all the time! G talks about this too, and I have to say, I think I am starting to know what he means. It's like the comedian Bill Hicks said, "All I need is eight hours of sleep a day... and ten at night, and I'm golden!" 


So, I have been Vegan for two months tomorrow! No animal products, no meat, eggs, dairy, seafood, or honey!! And no, that's not why I'm tired, before some of you get started on me. I actually feel great regarding diet. The exhaustion feels mental and emotional. Like I'm trying to work out all this life/ goals/ dreams stuff. But diet wise, I feel so good, and so proud of accomplishing this. Until I actually focused on it, I had NO idea how much we consume has products from animals in it. It's everywhere to an infuriating extent. Even non- dairy creamer like CoffeeMate contains the product casein- the main protein found in cow's milk. How messed up is that? Something that is advertised as non- dairy actually containing a major dairy component. Sick.


I became Vegan for animal rights reasons, and have been researching the diet extensively to make sure I am getting all the necessary elements to be balanced. Amazingly, the information I'm reading all points to some pretty amazing health benefits of a plant based diet. The book I'm reading now, "The China Study" is the culmination of 30 years of government funded research done by a scientist who was raised on a dairy farm and who's findings promote the healthful qualities of a vegan diet; to the extent that eating this way will reverse the progression of a variety of our Western cultures diseases, including diabetes, heart disease, obesity, and many cancers!!! Sign me up! I know these sound like incredible statements. But I urge you if you have any interest in health or food, to pick up a copy.


More on my cruelty free diet next blog, here's to two months on April 8th!! Yippee!

Monday, April 4, 2011

Back Again.

I think what was starting to happen was that my focus was unraveling after the last post. I get that way especially if I have been flying a lot, which I was. The longer I'm home, it's like I just get back to myself. When I was in college, and afraid to fly, one of my friends from the renaissance festival told me that your soul can only fly at some certain speed... I can't remember what, like, maybe fifty miles an hour or something. So when you fly, supposedly, your soul is just kinda trailing along behind you, not quite able to keep up, and that's what jet lag is. I know that sounds completely ridiculous, but, really, in a big way, that feels pretty true. After about a week off from flying, my soul just catches up and I begin caring again about doing things besides sleeping and eating. 


I started a twitter feed, so if you like to follow me, I'll be searchable and under the username FutureFarmicorn. Something like a hybrid of Future Farmer, of course, and Unicorn, of COURSE! Both things I aspire to be, especially the unicorn part. I'd like to eventually be connecting to people already farming, people with farm animal experience and knowledge, people in the local foods and organic foods movement, and people generally living earth consciously and respectfully within our community. If you are someone like this, please reach out! I have a ton to learn, for sure. 

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Hey.

So the novelty of writing is starting to wear off. So don't want to be a whiner, or a winer... or one of those boring people that when you say "Hey! How are you doing?" actually starts to tell you how they are. And not really sure where the thread of this should be going.


I'm in the middle of a 6 day sequence right now. Currently, I'm mildly buzzed, in my room in Fort Lauderdale, which is not nearly as bitchin' as the Marriott Courtyard which we used to stay in right across from Ft. Lauderdale beach, listening to some creepy music from the Matrix on my ipod mini. Oh yeah. This is living the dream. Just kidding.


Not that fll isn't freakin' amazing. Just that I would like to spend more than 16 hours here at a time. And maybe with some fun friendys or family for once. Just read about an article about a guy who grew some guinea hens with his wife,  or was trying to...


Oh, really not feeling this right now. Feeling like I should be writing a musical instead of some drivel-y blog.  Blogs are loser creepy basement writers... I hope you all are happy that I've been reduced to a creepy, pimply, greasy basement blogger. Even if I am in Fort Lauderdale. I've bought into it, you see! I'm in my virtual basement!! Guidos are down in the bar hitting on my fellow crew members right now, and here I am up in my room, rambling to an empty room! This is utter crap. I would say it's bullsh*t, but I don't know if that's really good blog form. Whatever. I've gotta go. Actually, really do. Spring ahead tonight, and just realized I am losing an hour. Whoops.


Talk to you soon. Maybe.

Sunday, March 6, 2011

Chopping block.

Happy Sunday Funday, everyone!! I so far totally hate all my posts. But I am going to keep doing it; I think it's one of those things that totally suck, but is good for you. Especially in that I want all of you to think that I am really so very awesome, and if I am writing things about my feelings and things I care about, you will all realize that I'm just a big poser, and not very cool at all. (I sooo hope you won't think that!!)


So, I chopped off all my hair! I did it on Friday, totally on a whim. In the past, I have gotten really emotional when I've cut my hair- especially when going from very long to short. I've literally burst into tears after and hated myself for doing something so drastic. And this is after planning the haircut waaaaaay in advance. So, I told the receptionist when I made the appointment that it would probably be best to have someone very awesome/ sympathetic because I might be having this reaction... I go to the Aveda Pure Talent Salon, and see a different stylist every time so I can't build up haircut stress, or a personal relationship where I feel bad to tell the girl or guy if I'm not getting what I want. This is all due to the crazy, crying, past haircut trauma. So. I went. Chopped it off! About 12 to 13 inches!! And I didn't cry at all! It was amazing. I was really ready to let that hair go. The stylist, her name was Hannah, was great, and put the hair into two ponytails before cutting it, and I literally watched her saw through it in the mirror. I laughed through the whole thing.


I can see many of you furrowing your brows like this is really something kind of stupid to get so worked up about, because hair grows back, and who cares, and etc. You are totally right. But for some reason, my hair has always been a really big deal to me, whether it is long or short, but especially when I have grown it out long for a while. It kind of has a special meaning when you've grown your hair very long, and for me, I think I needed that long hair like a shield when my dad got sick, and Garett cut his fingers really bad and needed 38 stitches, and we had decided to try to get pregnant, and did, really fast, and then lost it. That's something I don't ever share, and something that growing my hair out seemed to protect me against. Hard to explain, but that's how I felt. And Now, I feel like I don't need that shield. We are starting to do okay, better than okay, and my dad's cancer has been over a year in remission, and I feel great and ran a marathon last June to prove it, and Garett's fingers work again, and he got a new job, and I am not eating meat anymore and I feel like it is suddenly okay to cut my hair and do something creative and tell people that a lot of really bad things happened to us at the end of 2008 and all the way through 2009. But 2010 was awesome, and we are still here, and I suddenly don't feel ashamed to admit that all that bullshit happened. Because we survived it! And we are actually all better for it. Definitely some scars- especially G's fingers- but we are here! I am proud of that.


I am letting go of all the stress of that time in our lives and looking toward what we have yet to accomplish. When I was in college, I took a semester and the summer off to travel in my van and work on the Renaissance Festival circuit. I was totally hippy-ed out and my parents were devastated and thought I would never return to finish school and just become a life long burn- out. That is a blog for another day... probably several other days... but in my travels I was friends with this awesome woman, Leah. She had spent time in the Rasta community and had really lived a lot of experiences. I really respected her take on the world. She told me, the reason why hairdressers know so much gossip is because our hair is our history. When someone touches or holds onto your hair, they are holding onto months, or even years of your life and experience. That's why so many people dish about their lives on the stylist's chair, because their history and what is going on with them is literally being touched. I believe it. That's why I think I needed to hold onto that hair while my dad was very ill; because it was the hair that danced with him on my wedding night. I needed to hold onto the history where he was okay, and so was I, and so was everyone, before we all had the worst year of our lives. That hair was the wreckage that I was clinging to after the storm tore the ship apart.


And now we are a year out from that storm, and I think I can finally let down the shield. I donated my ponytails to Wigs 4 Kids, who makes free wigs for children suffering from blood cancers, courtesy of the Childhood Leukemia Foundation, in honor of my dad, Roger Granere, who's really just a big kid himself and skied upwards of 40 days since he has been cancer free. Can I just say, I'm jealous of that.


Good resources for donating your hair to children and learning about blood cancers are cfl4kids.com, and leukimia.org. My dad's type of blood cancer is called multiple myeloma.


Thanks for reading. XO, Val

Friday, March 4, 2011

My Ears are a~Ringing.

Seriously, my ears are ringing. Lame. Oh, I had so many reasons for blah~ging tonight, but, now that I'm actually doing it I can't remember any of the reasons. Brilliant. 


So, I watched a really cute video on pygmy goats a friend posted on fb. I'm totally sold. Also, the friend posted something about mini pigs. Very cute, though a little more weird. Pigs should be a little more fat and honest in my opinion. Don't be trying to be a tiny  pig. Just be a pig! Be yourself, you know? Stop trying to be some frail,skinny, tiny pork. Fill it out! Be a PIG! Awesome! It's everyone's dream, so you should live it, trust me. Anyway...


So, I was talking as though I would quit air hostessing tomorrow or something the other day. Friends, this is not the case. I will be in the air as a happy stewardess for at least another year, and really, maybe indefinitely, though favorably at the very minimum hours. I appreciate my buds who gently remind me of the excellent perks of the job. You are my Favs, and if I could fly with you all the time I would probably be singing a very different tune. As is, have had drag crews, drag schedules, and drag positions for quite a while, and with little relief in sight!


We have our loft on the market now. I'm happy about it. I love the loft sooooo much, seriously. But we are both ready to move on from the downtown area and get onto some land! I don't have any idea where we are going to go but we are planning to rent for a while and save up to buy our FARM property!! Probably we're two years out, optimistically.


Actually, I've been so bummed out today because we were really hoping to be able to purchase a house next to my mom & dads' house in Golden. There was really no way we were going to be able to realistically do this, and yet, our dreaming and scheming was keeping up pushing as hard as we could to be able to acheive it. We finally did pull back, knowing in our hearts it was not going to be in the best interests for anyone, though it was everyone's favorite idea... Eww, that sounds really cryptic. Really, we just didn't have the cash for a down payment, only a few hundred thousand dollars shy... No biggie. We just wish that we had it. So, I got to tell my parents about that today, and tell the lady and her son about that today as well. I've felt bad. Like, why can't the stew position pay like, eighty grand a year? Hello? We are lifesavingprofessionalmagazinereaders!! Seriously. 


I thin I'm going to wrap it up for the night. But I just want to say, if I ever start a band, probably 'lifesavingprofessionalmagaszinereaders' will be the name of said band. That, or 'Bucket of Puppies'. Cute, right? Love you guys. XO

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Lots to think about...

First of all, would like to say thank you to everyone who took time to actually read my first post. I was surprised, to say the least. Thanks in part, especially, to a few really nice sentiments; well, really, to everyone who commented to me, you made me feel very legit in my crazy farm and art fantasy feelings!


I think part of what is driving my need to create something more is my job... and getting a puppy. Randomly, though I love taking care of G, he is more than capable of taking care of himself. Feminists, don't hate, but I think it would be fun to cook and manage the household, and hand him a martini at the door each night! But really, getting Teddy made me really realize the truth of my lifestyle. It's been creeping up on me for a while now. I work in the aviation industry, as an 'air hostess' (wink, you know what I mean...aka "Excuse me, Stewardess!"). As such, I am usually traveling at least two weeks out of the month. Ted really has brought my emotions to the surface about leaving home. I feel all this stress about leaving my husband, my dog, my mom and dad, missing events with friends all the time!! So, I'm thinking, even though I love the job, it's lost a lot of the luster it had when I first started. I think, though it's in my heart forever, I have more to accomplish in this life than serving Pepsis and fake laughing at weird jokes told to me by creepy strangers... So, I am making a pro and con list with you about my potential future dreamin'. 


Here are some scary things about starting a mini farm:
1. Chicken crap. Is it just, like, everywhere? Do I have to clean out the coop? I'm sure I do. Ick, I am not into that. 
2. Alpaca spit. I think they are pretty major spitters, right? What happens if you get llama spit in your eye? Also, are llamas and alpacas the same? Also, I want to shave them in the spring and make mittens out of their fur. Are they going to try to kick me while I do this? 
3. I'm allergic to horses. So, am I allergic to donkeys also? My mom says yes. I say, maybe not. Does anyone have anything to back up either side of this argument? We've got nothing, either of us.
4. Oh my gosh, how am I going to grow anything successfully!? Just general ignorance and fear here. Don't even know where to begin research when I'm living in an industrial loft surrounded by concrete. 


Here are some scary things about leaving air hostessing:
1. Getting the H away from whatever it is going on at home. Not like anything is every going on at home that I want to get away from... But the travel becomes kind of addicting, even when you are going to such fabulous destinations as Detroit and Mil-yuk-ee.
2. WILL I BE MAKING A HUGE MISTAKE?? Does everyone have this thought when they are making a big life decision? Especially when you are starting to get to be acting like an adult and aren't really unhappy in your current situation, but are yearning for a change? High school teachers, please feel free to weigh in on this. I'm wishing for some advice circa Arvada West 1998!
3.4.5... Travel Benefits. We aren't going on fancy trips right now, but we want to!! Should I hang on, even at minimum hours, if possible, so me can continue to non-rev on our future fancy trips?


Okay, I guess this was more of a 'freak out on each choice' list than a 'pro/con' list. But now that everyone's exhausted with all these questions and speculations, it's time to cool off. Turn on the American Idol, fire up the microwave for some hot pockets or some vegan cheese roll ups or whatever. Again, thanks for reading my non- destroyable diary. And thanks for any future comments to bolster me on or help me figure it all out. Talk to you later, as we say. XO







Friday, February 25, 2011

My Online Diary?

Well, hello(!), to anyone with enough spare time to bother with reading this (i.e., no one). So, I always hated journaling because I would get all deep and ridiculous and think I was writing some amazing stuff, and then would find these journals later and feel totally scandalized that I had written down anything as horrific as what I found myself reading and ultimately destroy journal after journal for fear of someone finding and reading what I had written and realizing what a ridiculous person I have been all along. There. I said it. And I am probably going to feel that way about this project too... Unfortunately, now what I write down will be in the monstrous hands of cyberspace and the interweb and all that, so there really is no turning back from here, after all, I can't tear the pages out of this 'book' so I can start with a fresh blank page, or any of that. But, you know, I think that's probably good. I am ready to let some ridiculousness shine through at this point. I'm 31, so, if that's what I am, I should just go for it, right?
Teddy Edde


I have absolutely no idea where to begin. Last year was my 'Golden Year'~ I turned 30 on the 30th (December). And it really turned out to be such a great year! I ran my first marathon in Steamboat Springs. I paid off a ton of debt with my husband's help, to be personally debt free. We got a puppy, totally the goal of a lifetime for me; Teddy Edde, he is truly the best little mini schnauzer ever. G & I climbed two 14'ers for our second anniversary~ Grey's & Torrey's Peaks, the first fourteen thousand foot peaks we've ever climbed. It was a kick ass year. 


Me at the start the Steamboat Marathon
So now here we are in 2011. We've been in our loft in Capitol Hill for three years now and have decided we want to move forward into some new endeavors. I want to start a mini farm. Yes, with like, a humongous vegetable garden, chickens, alpacas, and a mini goat. We want to do the farmer's markets, and I want to begin painting again and sell my artwork at the markets and in galeries. I want to build a barn that we can use not only for housing the animals at night but also for parties and movie nights and barn dances and I am going to light the entire thing with Christmas lights. I want all of this to eventually become our livelihood. I want time for G & I to write the stories we have stockpiled from endless nights of scheming. And I want all the time in the world for our families. I want our parents and brothers and sisters and friends in and out of our doors constantly. And I guess, I feel like starting this stupid blog and telling the world (i.e. no one) about it will be the best way to get things rolling, and encourage me to keep thinking about it. Why, I have no idea. I think blogs are kind of stupid. But then, I've already said that, right?
G & I at the Top of Torrey's Peak


So, If you are reading, thank you so much. Seriously, shouldn't you be reading something credible, or at least watching Grey's Anatomy? Just kidding, watching that show actually is worse than reading blogs. I don't even know if I can/ will/ want to keep this up, but for now I am going to state the goal of writing to you three times a week. 'Oh No!' you cry. 'I know.' I say, pitying you. But maybe we'll both end up liking it.